THE 1001 LIVES OF MR. BATJAY

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[::..mga awit..::]
Musika at Awitin ni BatJay, Ang Dating Folk Singer
ng Ma Mon Luk

[::..mga tula..::]
Mga Tula ni BatJay, Ang Makatang Hilaw

[::..patawa..::]
Where in the World is Spiderman?

[::..chameleon persona..::]
The 1001 Lives of Mr. BatJay

[::..mga parangal..::]
mga nag special mention sa kwentong tambay

[::..listahan..::]
SiraUlo




[::..ang nakaraan..::]










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May 01, 2005

THE PROPER WAY TO EAT STRAWBERRIES IN TEN EASY STEPS

THE PROPER WAY TO EAT STRAWBERRIES IN TEN EASY STEPS

HERE IT IS LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, the proper way to eat strawberries in 10 easy to follow steps.

1. BUY STRAWBERRIES AND CREAM

THE PROPER WAY TO EAT STRAWBERRIES IN TEN EASY STEPS, step 1

2. PICK STRAWBERRY FROM PACKET

THE PROPER WAY TO EAT STRAWBERRIES IN TEN EASY STEPS, step 2

3. ILAPIT SA MATA AT INSPEKSYONIN KUNG BULOK OR KUNG MAY DUMI

THE PROPER WAY TO EAT STRAWBERRIES IN TEN EASY STEPS, step 3

4. AMUY AMUYIN KUNG SARIWA

THE PROPER WAY TO EAT STRAWBERRIES IN TEN EASY STEPS, step 4

5. TIKMAN TIKMAN NA PARANG NANG IINGGIT

THE PROPER WAY TO EAT STRAWBERRIES IN TEN EASY STEPS, step 5

6. LAGYAN NG CREAM ANG STRAWBERRY

THE PROPER WAY TO EAT STRAWBERRIES IN TEN EASY STEPS, step 6

7. ILAPIT NA SA BIBIG AT BAKA MAHULOG PA ANG CREAM SA SAHIG AT BAKA MASAPAK KA NG ASAWA MO DAHIL NAGKAKALAT KA

THE PROPER WAY TO EAT STRAWBERRIES IN TEN EASY STEPS, step 7

8. ISUBO NA PARANG NAGPAPAKYUT PARA HINDI HALATANG OBVIOUS NA MATAKAW KA

THE PROPER WAY TO EAT STRAWBERRIES IN TEN EASY STEPS, step 8

9. WHAT THE HECK, MASARAP EH - KAYA ISUBO NANG BUO

THE PROPER WAY TO EAT STRAWBERRIES IN TEN EASY STEPS, step 9

10. INHALE, EXHALE... TAKE IT ALL IN SAMA PATI BETLOG. ESTE, ISUBO NANG LAHAT AND GET IT OVER WITH.

THE PROPER WAY TO EAT STRAWBERRIES IN TEN EASY STEPS, step 10

ngayon alam ko na ang pakiramdam ng may bino blowjob. THE END.

Posted by jayd at 12:10 PM | Comments (5) | TrackBack

February 20, 2005

ITO ANG HITSURA KO PAGKATAPOS MAGLANDING NG EROPLANO KANINANG MADALING ARAW

ITO ANG HITSURA KO PAGKATAPOS MAGLANDING NG EROPLANO KANINANG MADALING ARAW

Posted by jayd at 01:06 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 04, 2005

TITS THE SEASON TO BE JOLLY

TITS THE SEASON TO BE JOLLY

Posted by jayd at 03:41 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 01, 2005

The Devil and the Deep Blue Sea

Balak kong i-publish ang picture na ito sa website ng Ripley's Believe it or don't. Iniisip ko na nga ang mga possible titles...

1. madonna and child
2. mother and son
3. kalabog and bosyo
4. radical chef and the circumcised chef
5. rain man
6. thelma and louise
7. godzilla and mothra

ano sa tingin ninyo?

The Devil and the Deep Blue Sea

Posted by jayd at 03:41 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

December 28, 2004

So, tell before you come to me from out of yonder skies, a man's a man who looks a man right between the eyes

BAKA MAPANIS YAN... eto ang hitsura ng sinkit
na pango
na galit sa mundo
na lalaking
nangungulangot?

ang cute ko no?

Posted by jayd at 03:40 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

December 26, 2004

Ain't no particular sign I'm more compatible with

Ain't no particular sign I'm more compatible with

Posted by jayd at 03:40 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

December 24, 2004

FIRST CUT IS THE DEEPEST

THE FIRST CUT IS THE DEEPEST, BABY IT'S TRUE

Posted by jayd at 03:40 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

December 18, 2004

12 VERSIONS OF NGATAIN MO

12 VERSIONS OF NGATAIN MO

Posted by jayd at 03:40 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

November 12, 2004

MORPHING GMA AND BATJAY

MORPHING GMA AND BATJAY

Posted by jayd at 02:48 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

The 1001 Lives of Mr. BatJay - sightings all over the world of the Karma Chameleon himself.


THE BEST  BLOGGER  FOR 2004

[::..kategorya..::]
CELEBRITIES
PINOY
PROFESSIONS
SUPERHEROES
WEIRD


[::..mga kinaiinisan..::]

george w bush's smirk, mga pangalan na nilalagyan ng "h" (katulad ng jhune, dhanny, jhoey, jhim, jhay, jhet, mayron pa nga akong kilalang piph), tunog ng baril ni agent X44 Tony Falcon, tunog ng suntok ng mga pelikulang pinoy, people who say "at the end of the day" all the time, allergic reactions to seafood, tunog ng stirofoam pag pinisil, tunog ng kinaskas na kuko sa blackboard, war, alikabok, the term "weapons of mass destruction", sales people who always say "absolutely", people who don't take a bath everyday, anghit, people who don't change their shirts everyday, tropical heat, people with anghit who don't take a bath and don't change their shirts everyday at kasabay mong maglakad in the tropical heat, cnn's jim clancey's reporting, monday afternoons, NAIA, the term "liberating the iraqi people", jeepney fumes, standing on a bus going home, cruise missles, pelikulang bumbay, stale coffee, tomahawk missles, january 2, ping lacson, tessie aquino ureta, pimples, powdered orange juice, elevator music, kenny-g's music, elevator playing kenny-g's music, donald rumsfeld's squint, funeral parlors, hospitals, hospital morgues, cold showers, nagtataeng ballpen, nagtataeng ballpen na nakalagay sa bulsa ng puting polo shirt, lapis na bale, disco music, rap music, loud bar music, loud rap music played in a bar, non-functioning remote control, scientific calculators that are not casio, automatic watches that stop in the middle of the night, smelly farts that are not mine, come to think of it - any kind of fart that did not come from my asshole, "bawal umihi dito" signs (ang mahole, bogbog), sunglasses na tabingi pag sinuot mo, yellow-orange shirts, pink pants for men, pantalon na bitin, lalaki na naka yellow-orange shirt na may ternong pink pants na bitin, lawlaw na shorts, tsinelas na luma, loud preachers inside a bus (PRAISE THE GOD!), el shaddai, amerikana ni brother mike, brother mike, good friday, american war propaganda, train stations in india, being thirsty, LBM, smelly hair, ugly american speeches, tinapay na may amag, mainit na coke, soft boiled egg na sobrang soft, CNN reporters na pumipikit-pikit pag nagrereport, sign pen na walang tinta, CD na tumatalon, abstract painting na binebenta sa bangketa sa quiapo, palenkeng maputik, cell phones ringing inside theatres, sappy love song ring tones, sappy love song ringtones ringing inside theatres, loud text message ringtones, mcdo hamburgers na may chii sauce, taxes, ringing phones at 2 o clock in the morning, traffic jams, fast changing traffic lights, war councils, tapilok, somebody wearing turtle neck sweaters in manila, somebody wearing leather jackets in manila, somebody wearing leather jackets over tutleneck sweaters in manila, the term "decisive force", censorship, self righteous people, self righteous censors, names i can't pronounce, people calling me "david", riding in a car that's been left baking in an open parking lot in manila at 12 o clock noon, pentel pen na malapit nang maubusan ng tinta, the disco song entitled "zodiac", low batt cellphone right when you need it, underpowered cars, stars on 45 music, stars on 45 music being played inside buses, stars on 45 being played inside a bus when a preacher suddenly shouts "PRAISE THE LORD" while you are a few seconds from finally taking a nap, funeral wreathes, lumang pera, kahit anong pelikula ni steven segal (except yung kasama niya si idol kong tommy lee jones), ang mukha ni prime minister john howard ng australia, "operation iraqi freedom"...
...AND, the most kinaiinisang bagay-bagay as of late: the term "shock and awe".